...A very special day!

....A very special day indeed!

Preparations are in full force in Heaven because a birthday party will start shortly. A beautiful baby girl, Molly Marie is celebrating her first birthday!

It is certainly a beautiful day, yet painful and bittersweet for her family here on earth.

Please join me in celebrating Molly´s life today, and have her and her family in your thoughts and prayers.

Happy birthday little Molly, you are extremely lucky to have such a wonderful family, you will be foreved missed and loved!!!...

We are back

We had a great time, enjoyed ourselves and celebrated by birthday!!!

It was a great get away and now, we are back to our daily routine. AF arrived this past weekend and I will be starting the last pack of B..C..P.. this coming Wednesday.

Farah asked me a while ago, how it felt to be trying again.... Well, we really have not started the fun part yet, but up to this point it has been very different from last time. The IF wound is there and it will never go away, but it doesn't hurt as much as it used to. I am not sad when I look at pregnant bellies or when I hear pregnancy announcements. I have found myself actually happy, hoping really hard to have that opportunity one more time, but then at the same time, being extremelly aware that it may not happen, and knowing that if that is the case, I will get through it.

Having our daughter, for me, has certainly make this a road a lot more pleasant. She keeps me grounded, grateful, hopeful.

Many doors will appear on our road in the months to come. I trust the one that opens will be the best one for us, so I am just going with the flow, just about to start knocking on doors to find out THE ONE.

At peace

We are going away for a few days to enjoy some free time, the sun, the beach and everything in between.

I can´t really explain how well I feel. I am incredibly grateful for this peace that settled in my mind and in my heart. I guess I got to the point to really understand there are, and will be, many things that I can´t control and I am OK with it.

I let go.

Don´t get me wrong, I haven´t given up, I still want a sibling to my daughter but I have found extreme peace in realizing I am not in control. There are many ways to get there. At this point I am not sure which is the one. I don´t know if my ovaries will cooperate enough and even if they do, it is not a guarantee that we will be able to conceive again, but then there is the do.nor. egg rou.te, or a.dop.tion…. Both of them are truly expensive options, but we will see once we get there. I have come to terms with the fact that there is a possibility that I will not be biologically related to our future child, or children….. and I am completely at peace with it.

And if for some reason, neither option turn out for us, I am sure I will be fine too.

I will be forever grateful for what I have, for as long as I have it.