Back to reality...

As of today I am back to work….

Honestly, I didn’t know what to do…. My first thoughts were that if we could afford it, I should stay at home, but then there is this other side of me telling that there is nothing wrong to keep working, at least part time to keep “connected” some how with the work environment…

My father died when I was four and my mom was a SAHM up until he died. It was very difficult for her to get a job so she could provide for my brother and me. There was always food on our table, and clothes to wear, but things were difficult, on the economic part. I believe it has had an impact on me and, there is always this memory coming back and that is why I want to keep working. I guess it gives me some kind of “security” to know that I am able to earn my own salary and provide for our daughter if I need to.

…It was difficult to leave her in the morning, I hope it will get easier.

Let’s see how this works out!

Dr. Appointment - 3 months

We were supposed to go to our daughter's 3 month Dr. Appointment next week, on the 23rd, but they called last Tuesday to reschedule it to yesterday, so yesterday we went!

This time, she didn't get any immunization shots, which I am sure she was happy about!!!... She did get weighed and measured. One week shy of being 3 months old she weights 5.100 kg (11lb 4oz) and measures 57.5cm (22.637 in).

She had an electrocardiogram performed. It seems normal practice, at this dorctor's office, to have it done at 3 months to rule out any congenital issues. I hope the results come back OK.

I believe I hadn't mentioned before, but she had a blocked tear duct and the doctor prescribed some drops to apply 3 times a day before giving massage to the area. I had been doing the massages since I noticed about the tear duct but didn't see any change, but the drops did help - no more blocked tear duct!

On a different subject, I was a little bit concerned because she had been having about 5 bowel movements per day and 2 weeks ago they decreased to one every 48 hrs or so. The doctor said it was OK - She is just having breastmilk, no formula as I my milk supply has been enough to satisfy her needs up until now, so there haven't been any change on the feeding side that could have made a difference.... If any of my experienced moms out there have any comments about this issue I will really appreciate them.

Overall, we are both doing fine, she is just my "everything" and melts my heart everyday. She is starting to discover that her arms and hands are actually hers, so it is funny to look at her crossed eyes staring at her fists.... I love her!

Have a great weekened!

...The decision making process

I still have about two more weeks of maternity leave….
…and I am happy about it!!!….

I have been thinking a lot about what to do once it is over. The first option is to go back to work full time….Before IF and all what happened, I believe I would have do it without question. Then, there is always the possibility of not returning to work at all and become a stay at home mom. I could find something else to do on my own, without schedules to comply with, and I believe we could afford it,… but an extra income is always welcome, you know…. and even more when we have a school loan to pay back, in USD,….. and well, I am fortunate enough to earn my salary in USD actually, without leaving in the US…. That is a huge relief, because if there is any major change in the exchange rate it wouldn’t affect us and/or increase our debt.

….Buuuuut, to keep having that “relief” I must continue working, I assume so!… I have a great relationship with both of my bosses but not to the extent of getting paid without doing nothing!!

….And there is plan C also, which would be working part time. Going to the office during the mornings and stay at home during the afternoons.

I went to talk to my boss about it last week and he is practically OK with whatever we decide to do. It is greally great to know that he is so supportive and that there are other options open besides the full time one…

Ohhhh well, I guess we have to decide soon!!!

A new life - A new person...

I had an endocrinologist’s appointment about two weeks ago, to check up my thyroid levels. I was in the waiting room and a few minutes later the doctor came out of her office and came into the waiting room and as soon as she saw me, she goes like:

“ ….So your girl and you are the miracles of the 23rd?”… Come in; let’s see how are you doing…

Once in her office she told me she was shocked when she knew about my emergency (because it had been a great pregnancy with no issues or complications AT ALL) but even more in shock to knew that our daughter is, first of all, alive, and that she recovered the way she did. She told me that it was truly a miracle considering my placental abruption’s high grade and therefore all the lost blood.

….Then the first time we saw the pediatrician in his office he also told us to consider ourselves very fortunate because it really wasn’t common to have the outcome we had, considering the circumstances….

WOW, it really gives me chills everytime I think about it and I really have no words to express how grateful I feel.

When I was first diagnosed I had my first meeting with IF world and I was changed,

….then we got pregnant on our own, surprisingly, and my life took a new path….

….then, after 8 months of an incredible pregnancy I had an extreme emergency and survived, with the best possible outcome….. That, that gave me a new life and made me a new person ....

… A woman with the most beautiful scar on her tummy, to always remember the presence of God in her life.