Friday, August 8, 2008

The reality is setting in - and it is not bad at all!

This has been my second week back to work. And I am so, so happy to report that everything seems to be going great.

R is staying at home with her nanny during the mornings while I am at work and she is doing fine so far. I am pumping once at work and save it for the next day when R gets her middle morning feed, and I continue to nurse her the rest of the day. My day looks something like this:

4.00 AM Nurse R her first feeding of the day, get her back to sleep
7.00 AM Nurse R, then she stays up playing
7.30 AM Get ready for work
8.30 – 2.00 PM Work at the office (one pumping session at around 11)
2.00 PM Go back home, eat lunch
3.00 PM Nurse R
3.30 PM – 6.30PM Work from home
6.30 PM Nurse R
7.00 PM Playtime – I sing to her, dance with her, we go for a walk, etc….
7.30 PM Grocery shopping, dry cleaning, etc – I take R with me most of the times
8.30 PM R bath time
9.00 PM Nurse R
9.30 PM R goes to sleep

It is not bad at all. Really. And I am very fortunate to have this kind of flexibility at work. Plus, I have find R very happy every day when I come back home. She is either playing or taking a nap.

I must confess – I still have this guilt feeling about leaving her – and it is not going away. I guess is normal and I don’t think I am being a bad mother, I just feel guilty, but then realize there is no guilt if she is doing fine, it is not like she is being all miserable when I am away and that is what keeps me going every day, trying to find a nice balance between work and parenting!


Fertilized said...

i am so glad to hear that there is a time when you can get things done and on a semi schedule

I think mother's guilt just lingers on from now until eternity

ultimatejourney said...

I'm glad things are going so well!!!

Kathy said...

You sound great T-Mommy! Glad that things are going so well for you and your family. I agree w/ Farah that no matter what we do we will always feel some level of mother's guilt for one reason or another. Anyway, I wanted to check in and let you know that I am still here, reading, listening and cheering you on.